First Session of Conflict Resolution

So, our group had our first session at the Boys and Girl’s Club yesterday. I thought that although it could of gone better, it also could have gone much worse. Overall, I thought it was a successful visit, which is doubly impressive considering our subject material. There were about 8 kids in all, and we started pretty promptly. 

They responded really well to the wants and needs activity. I started that activity by asking them what made them happy, which garnered responses at first like break dancing, and basketball. Eventually though, they started saying some really cool intangible concepts, like loyalty, honesty, and respect. They also said various people, such as family and friends. We then differentiated between the concepts of needs and wants. As a group, we determined that needs are something that everyone has a right to, while wants are not necessary for everyone. Following this, we categorized the things on the list into wants (i.e. basketball), and needs (i.e. food, sleep, respect, love), and looked at how common needs play an important role in conflicts. 

Following this, Brady introduced the concept of conflict resolution, and then we focused on various situations in which conflict was present, and how they typically handled these conflicts. We then tried to introduce different ways of handling conflicts, with an emphasis on respecting your feelings as well as the feelings of the other person. At that age, and with such a (fairly) abstract topic, I knew that we would have some trouble. They seemed to grasp pretty quickly the “how”, but I think that the “why” is something that takes a while to sink in, and I think as our sessions progress, it’ll get easier. 

Conflict Resolution can be a pretty corny topic when presented in a certain way, so I really tried hard not to sound too preach-y during the session. I found that when I talked about conflict in my own family, specifically with my little brother, they all seemed to connect with that. I could tell that most of them had siblings that were older, and who they really looked up to, or younger, who they loved and felt protective of. I feel that that could be a good way to approach some of the trickier topics in our next sessions. Also, I really felt that these kids responded really strongly to sincerity; if I was being bogus on anything, they could totally see through it, but when I talked to them as equals, with sincere respect, I felt that I connected much more with them. I think that we will continue to make a lot of progress, and this will be a pretty successful program overall.       

We had a few problems with talking and cell phones, but I think that that can be addressed pretty effectively in our next session, and function as an example of conflict resolution.